Category Archives: Uncategorized

 

 

Best Experienced With:        A Capella Version of Neil Young’s After The Gold Rush

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music too this evening’s celebratory mathematics gathering.    Damn fine version of “After The Goldrush”.   You are cheating yourself and your ears if you choose not to right click on the link below.    If you cheat your ears, they may choose to grow unnaturally large as you get older and that’s not something you want.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6BzTCQ6Nqo

 

Bertrand Russel once wrote:  “mathematics is the subject in which we know neither what we are talking about nor whether what we say is true”.   Opining from this chair on mathematics is analogous to opining from this chair on how to dunk a basketball or raise your children.   Of the millions of things in which I am notable and obvious in my mediocrity, mathematics is towards the top of the list.   Mathematics has structure,  laws, order, and singular correct answers.   You would be hard pressed to find many other things in life or business that have predictable structure, laws, predictable order, and singular correct answers.

Business plans, pro forma financials, sales & marketing plans, SEC required annual reports and 10Q’s are littered with assumptions.     Many, but not all, of these assumptions are rooted in math and math-y equations.     Math taught each of us to examine problems in detail before jumping into them, patience in problem solving, and the attention to detail necessary to come up with the final solution.   Math helps us see and understand patterns and relationships.   Perhaps most important, math helps us to think logically.   When I hire people, “logical thinking” is in the top quintile of the ideal traits.   Logical thinking rules the world of business.

We are using the internet right now because of math, more precisely because of prime numbers.    From Pascal’s triangle to the elusive Riemann Hypothesis, there is a ridiculous amount of beauty in math, primes, and those who can actually work with them.    Which I cannot.   Pascal and Fibonacci most certainly can.

Being a man and, of course, wanting what I cannot have more than enjoying what I have…I crave skills at mathematics.   There is a deep well of love here for mathematics and numbers.    There is also a deep well of love for orchids because you only have to water orchids once every three weeks and they make you look like a botanical genius when you keep such a a beautiful flower alive for months on end.   Neither the beautiful number sequences below nor the orchid photos from Chez Mully are my own work.     I claim them as my own to add to my marketability: another one of the areas in which I am notable in my mediocrity.    Enjoy the pretty flowers and numbers and thanks for visiting.

 

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

 

 

9 x 9 + 7 = 88

98 x 9 + 6 = 888

987 x 9 + 5 = 8888

9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888

98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888

987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888

9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888

98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

 

 

1 x 1 = 1

11 x 11 = 121

111 x 111 = 12321

1111 x 1111 = 1234321

11111 x 11111 = 123454321

111111 x 111111 = 12345654321

1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321

11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321

111111111 x 111111111=12345678987654321

 

 

 

 

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 987 65
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

[1] “1 x 9 + 2 = 11″
[1] “12 x 9 + 3 = 111″
[1] “123 x 9 + 4 = 1111″
[1] “1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111″
[1] “12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111″
[1] “123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111″
[1] “1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111″
[1] “12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111″
[1] “123456789 x 9 + 10 = 1111111111″
[1] “1234567900 x 9 + 11 = 11111111111″
[1] “12345679011 x 9 + 12 = 111111111111″
[1] “123456790122 x 9 + 13 = 1111111111111″
[1] “1234567901233 x 9 + 14 = 11111111111111″
[1] “12345679012344 x 9 + 15 = 111111111111111″
[1] “123456790123455 x 9 + 16 = 1111111111111111″
[1] “1234567901234566 x 9 + 17 = 11111111111111112″
[1] “12345679012345676 x 9 + 18 = 111111111111111104″
[1] “123456790123456784 x 9 + 19 = 1111111111111111040″
[1] “1234567901234567936 x 9 + 20 = 11111111111111110656″
[1] “12345679012345677824 x 9 + 21 = 1.11111111111111e+20

[1] “1 x 8 + 1 = 9″
[1] “12 x 8 + 2 = 98″
[1] “123 x 8 + 3 = 987″
[1] “1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876″
[1] “12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765″
[1] “123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654″
[1] “1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543″
[1] “12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432″
[1] “123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321″
[1] “1234567900 x 8 + 10 = 9876543210″
[1] “12345679011 x 8 + 11 = 98765432099″
[1] “123456790122 x 8 + 12 = 987654320988″
[1] “1234567901233 x 8 + 13 = 9876543209877″
[1] “12345679012344 x 8 + 14 = 98765432098766″
[1] “123456790123455 x 8 + 15 = 987654320987655″
[1] “1234567901234566 x 8 + 16 = 9876543209876544″
[1] “12345679012345676 x 8 + 17 = 98765432098765424″
[1] “123456790123456784 x 8 + 18 = 987654320987654272″
[1] “1234567901234567936 x 8 + 19 = 9876543209876543488″
[1] “12345679012345677824 x 8 + 20 = 98765432098765422592″

1 to 10 = 11×5 =55
1 to 100 = 101×50 =5050
1 to 1000 = 1001×500 =500500
1 to 10000 = 10001×5000 =50005000
1 to 100000 = 100001×50000 =5000050000
1 to 1000000 = 1000001×500000 =500000500000
1 to 10000000= 10000001×5000000=50000005000000

 

Pretty………………………..

Infinity……………………………..(click on photo below to blow it up for more infiniti clarity)

 

Best Experienced With:   The Jesus And Mary Chain:   Here Comes Alice

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested music to this afternoon’s gathering in a new browser window.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgIEBUy-Sag

“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”
“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the Cat.
“I don’t much care where–” said Alice.
“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the Cat.
“–so long as I get SOMEWHERE,” Alice added as an explanation.
“Oh, you’re sure to do that,” said the Cat, “if you only walk long enough.”

” Well! I’ve often seen a cat without a grin,” thought Alice; ” but a grin without a cat! It’s the most curious thing I ever saw in my life!”

 

 

Indeed.

 

 

 

Best Experienced With:       Kanye West             Jesus Walks

 

(Please righty click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s pop quiz in a new browser window.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-3gXet-ljs

We’ve not had a pop quiz here for months:  please pull out your Sharpie markers and let’s get busy.     Below are random quotes from Kanye West and Cornel West.    If you believe the quote is a quote from Cornel West, please annotate the following on your computer screen with your Sharpie:  “brilliant Princeton & Harvard professor author”.  If you believe the quote is a Kanye West quote, please annotate the following on your computer screen with your Sharpie: “Autotune, poser jackass”.

Thank you for visiting.    God speed and good luck.   On your mark, get set………………………go.

“The country is in deep trouble. We’ve forgotten that a rich life consists fundamentally of serving others, trying to leave the world a little better than you found it. We need the courage to question the powers that be, the courage to be impatient with evil and patient with people, the courage to fight for social justice. In many instances we will be stepping out on nothing, and just hoping to land on something. But that’s the struggle. To live is to wrestle with despair, yet never allow despair to have the last word.”

“A trunk full of coke, rental car from Avis.   My mama used to say only Jesus can save us.”

 

“You know what the Midwest is?  Young and restless.”

“You can’t lead the people if you don’t love the people. You can’t save the people if you don’t serve the people.”

“I want to talk to God, but I’m afraid because we ain’t spoke in so long”

“White supremacist ideology is based first and foremost on the degradation of black bodies in order to control them. One of the best ways to instill fear in people is to terrorize them. Yet this fear is best sustained by convincing them that their bodies are ugly, their intellect is inherently underdeveloped, their culture is less civilized, and their future warrants less concern than that of other peoples.”

“Even the strippers”

“They be asking us questions, harrass and arrest us”

“I remind young people everywhere I go, one of the worst things the older generation did was tell them for twenty-five years:  “Be successful, be successful, be successful” as opposed to “Be great, be great, be great”.

“My vision of democracy is each person unleashing the Socratic energies in their hearts and minds.”

“Define your own voice rather than imitating others. Cut against the forces of conformity. The forces of conformity are market-driven, driven by titillation and temptation, as opposed to decency and dignity.”

“Aesthetics have substantial political consequences. How one views oneself as beautiful or not beautiful or desirable or not desirable has deep consequences in terms of one’s feelings of self-worth and one’s capacity to be a political agent.”

“Next time I’m in the club, everyone is screaming out”.

“We’re here to convert atheists into believers”.

“The only thing I pray is that my feet don’t fail me now”.

“Hip-hop came from the killing fields of chocolate cities. Hip-hop artists constituted tremendous power, before they were ripped off by the record industry, and it all became about money. We went from MLK’s ‘let freedom ring’ to the bling-bling.”

 

“Who wants to be well adjusted to injustice?   What kind of human being do you want to be?”

 

 

 

 

 

For more on Cornell West, please visit the following links:

 

http://www.cornelwest.com/

http://www.discoverthenetworks.org/individualProfile.asp?indid=813

 

For more on Kanye West, please visit the following link:

http://www.moron.com

 

 

Best Experienced With:       Government Mule;     Soul Shine

(please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s treatise in a new browser window)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lXbsq3C4LZM

 

There are two treatises that grow and grow and grow and grow on this hard drive.    When finished, and if they ever see the light of day, they will make Tolstoy’s War and Peace look like an US magazine.   They will make Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged look like People magazine.     The first, mentioned several times here revolves around Nashian Economics, fractals, and Razzles.   The second, the one originally slated for this evening, is primarily dedicated to neuroplasticity, niche marketing, and the canine Flehman response.    Incidentally, anyone who has finished Atlas Shrugged deserves a plate of brownies.    That’s a tough book to finish.    Have read the first four chapters at least three dozen times in the last few decades and can quote Dagny Taggart from those four chapters, yet none of the subsequent chapters.   Because I was fast asleep in the subsequent chapters.     Here’s your brownie.  You are welcome.

On Sunday, God is my muse.   The revelation that Pope Joe Ratzinger moved pedophile priest Peter Hullerman when he was the Archbishop in Germany was the last straw for me with the Catholic church.  My sainted and brilliant mother remains a deacon in her church and we still remain close friends, even though I refuse to again enter a Catholic church.  

This left a big religion vacuum and an excellent opportunity to be ridiculously intentional in choosing a new church. Nature abhors a vacuum and God abhors a pederast.   Having a good deal of extra time due to my childlessness, was fortunate to have the time to spend researching various religions.   Went to Nepal for a while and hired both a Hindu and Buddhist kid to tour me around, simultaneously.    Loved both of those religions yet was unwilling to embrace Vishnu, Ram, Siddhārtha Gautama, or Vamana as closely as God.   Because, outside of Ram, they are far more challenging to spell.

The church I intentionally chose has a single service at 10:30 each Sunday morning.   Our pastor, Brian, has a wife and three sons.  Brian often wears aloha shirts when he preaches and, coincidentally, he works out at my gym.  When you walk into our church and scan left to right, you’ll see thirty rows of chairs on each side and roughly one hundred people each Sunday morning.   Quite intentionally, I chose a small congregation.

We have two openly gay couples at the Pacific Beach Christian Church that I know of and we welcome all ages, colors, and creeds to visit on the weekends.     The PB Christian Church has a very visible and recognizable “Recovery in Christ” program for those struggling with addiction.    Nothing is hidden or kept in a drawer.  Much like life, everything is out there for everyone to see.    Quite intentionally, I chose a church that represents the world as it is today, not as it was in 200 A.D. 

My new church is the most real church in the galaxy.  The lessons are fantastic at the Pacific Beach Christian Church.   

There are music lessons at my new church for a budding guitar player because we have a ridiculously good band with a lead guitarist playing a Fender Stratocaster.  Would hear the PB Christian Church crank out a great tune, go home, and learn some solid tunes like “People Get Ready”, “Forever Young”, and the Charlie Rich blues version of “Amazing Grace”.    We did not have those songs at Saint Bernadette in The Land of Cleve, nor did anyone play a Fender during the service.    God loves Fenders.

There are history lessons because Brian provides outstanding historic depth in his sermons.   For example, 537 B.C. was an awful time in Jewish history until King Cyrus of Persia jumped in and sent the Jewish folks home to rebuild.  Saint Nicholas was actually as Bishop who snuck around and gave gold cows to the poorest folks in town.  Four million people were killed in the Congo in the last fifteen years because of the raw material needed for cell phones, Colton.   Magnficent history lessons each week at the PB Christian Church.

Most important, there are fantastic life lessons at the Pacific Beach Christian Church.  After that first 10:30 a.m. session, I began bringing a notebook because when you hear things that make you go “hmmmmmm”, you oughta write them down.   Here’s a random sampling:

• Without courage, you cannot practice any of the other virtues consistently.
• The words we use and the way we use them have the ability to breathe light and darkness into all of our relationships.
• What is crooked cannot be straightened and what is lacking cannot be counted.
• The tongue is the most powerful muscle in the body because it has the power to build up and tear down.
• You can judge the behavior, but you cannot judge the person…that is reserved for God.
• The difference between a labyrinth and a maze is that a labyrinth always ends in the middle.
• Evangelism only works when you can admit your own losses:   it is not genuine when you do not admit and repent

 

When you picture James Earl Ray’s upbringing, what do you see?  When you picture James Earl Ray’s church congregation, what do you see?  What was it that caused Mr. Ray to shoot Mr. King from the balcony of the Lorainne Hotel in Memphis, Tennessee on April 4, 1968.  The nature versus nurture debate is an interesting one:  an interesting argument that throws the free will baby out with the bathwater.  My father, Glove Man called MLK Day “super nigger day” when I was young.   I have always referred to Monday as “Martin Luther King day”.   While I truly do not believe my father is a true racist, that holiday label is one I never adopted at home.   We make our own choices as we pull our adult skins over our shoulders, zipping them snugly into place like a Quicksilver 3/2 suit. 

The woman who called me “husband” for three years was half Thai and spent her first ten years in Thailand, the daughter of a serviceman and a Thai national.   Interestingly enough, she saw color far, far more often than I did, perhaps because she dealt with not being Caucasian more than I did through her life.   I have spent exactly zero days as a non Caucasian.  We would walk into crowded spaces at restaurants or bars and heads would turn.   She would invariably say aloud:  “they are trying to figure out what I am.”  I would invariably reply:  “No, they are looking because you are ridiculously beautiful.”  We both believed what we believed.

I intentionally chose my church because I truly believe that my God loves everyone equally.   She/He loves every color the same.   She/He loves every sexual preference the same.    She/He loves every sinner and every saint in exactly the same fashion.   She/he loves those who love and those who choose not to love.  She/He is patient with those who share a differing view and chooses to hug it out rather than smote.  My God created Martin Luther King, Junior and also created the man who killed him.  My God is one of love.  

 

 

I, too, have the audcaity to believe that people everywhere can have three meals a day for their bodies, education for their minds, and dignity, equality, and freedom for their spirits.   If you have Martin Luther King Day off, go plant some love.  

 Thanks for visiting.   Good night

http://pbchristian.com/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Best Experienced With:           Bruce Springsteen;        The Chimes of Freedom 

(Please right click on the link below to open the song needed for our New Year sing along and prayer session in a new browser window.    Watch the velociraptor for the beat and sing it loud and proud.     Cry freedom)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WL87kBq9aiE

On New Year’s Day at Mind of Mully we always have a sing along, then we have a group prayer before we go rolling into the new year.  Lyrics from Bob Dylan, animation from Ty Mabrey, & velociraptor from God    Tenors in the back and altos to the front, please.   Tune up the guitar, velociraptor in place to keep time, and off we go……….

Well, far between sundown’s finish and midnight’s broken toll
We ducked inside the doorway, thunder crashing
As majestic bells of boats struck shadows in the sun;
Saying, it may be the chimes of freedom flashing

Flashing for the warriors whose strength is not to fight;
Flashing’ for the refugees on their unarmed road of flight.
And for each and every underdog soldier in the night
We gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing

Well, in the city’s melted furnace unexpectedly we watched
With faces hidden here while the walls were tightening
As the echo of the wedding bells before the blowing rain;
Dissolved into the wild bales of lightning

Yeah, tolling for the rebel, yeah, tolling for the raked
Tolling for the luckless, the abandoned and forsaked.
Yeah, tolling for the outcasts burning constantly at stakes
And we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing

(instrumental solo with velociraptor accompaniment)

 

And then through a cloud-like curtain in a far off corner flashed
There’s a hypnotic, splattered mist was slowly lifting
Well, electric light still struck like arrows
Fired but for the ones condemned to drift or else be kept from drifting

Well, tolling for the searching ones on this speechless, secret trail
For the lonesome haunted lovers with too personal a tale.
And for each young heart for each channeled soul misplaced inside a jail
Yeah, we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashin’

Well, starry eyed and laughing I recall when we were caught,
Trapped by no track of hours for they hang suspended
As we listened one last time, and we watched with one last look
Spellbound and swallowed “Has the tolling ended?”

Yeah, tolling for the aching ones whose wounds cannot be nursed
For the countless, confused, accused, misused strung out ones at worst.
And for every hung out person in the whole wide universe
We gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing

 

 

Dear Lord:

 

First, thanks for the velociraptor.   You always seem to know exactly what I want.   Thanks for a good year for all of us.   Thanks for getting Aung San Suu Kyi released from house arrest over there in Burma.  That was very cool of you and we no longer have to toll the bell of freedom for Aung San Suu Kyi.  That was a big one.   Gave a lot of oppressed folks hope.

 

 

For the next three hundred sixty five days, please keep the following folks front of mind, Lord.  Watch closely over Chinese dissident and Nobel Peace Prize winner Liu Xiaobo in his jail cell.  When the Swedes put his award in an empty chair this year, I fell in love with the Swedes all over again.    Also, can you please keep a close eye on Shiva Nazar Ahari, imprisoned in Iran’s Nevin prison for her support of human rights.

 

Lord, please watch over the hundreds of thousands of still homeless folks in Haiti and steer their leaders towards a government that takes care of its people.    Please watch closely over the Sudanese referendum on splitting the country next week and please keep it peaceful.   Sudan has had two long civil wars and You need to intercede a bit, if you have some extra time in January.  

 

Please watch over Alassane Ouattra and his supporters over there in the Ivory Coast.   Mr. Ouattra clearly won the election and Mr. Gbagbo is a rude goofball for not ceding power and killing Mr. Ouattra’s supporters over the past three weeks, Lord, also please take care of Kurdish student activist Habibollah Latifi and his wrongfully imprisoned family.   Iran will most likely execute Mr. Latifi for his opposition activism this coming week, so please watch over his soul and tend to his family.  Finally, please keep an eye on the freedom activists being persecuted and unfairly jailed by Belarussian President Alexander Lukashenko

 

There is one Man and The Man has many faces, Lord.   The Man also has riot police and prisons while those fighting for freedom and equality have only their voices.   I like to think they also have You on their side.    If you have any extra time this weekend and feel like smoting, feel free to smote The Man.   Am certain the rebel, the rake, the luckless, the abandoned, and the forsaked will appreciate your smoting The Man.

 

Moving into 2011, Lord, please allow my neighbors in the United States to be less whining, sniveling, and miserable?  Allow them to act like adults on a daily basis, rather than six year olds unleashed for the first time on a single sandbox with one complete set of toys.  One would think our country has the lowest GDP in the universe rather than the highest.  Further, to listen to the interviewees on Fox, and CNBC, and the other polarizing channels, we all wake up each day to sulfuric acid being poured into ears, then we walk uphill to work, barefoot, over broken glass….whereby we are beaten senseless for our meager wage and rolled back home in wheelbarrow full of sewage water.

 

We have it pretty darn good here comparatively and if you could open the eyes of some of these whining, sniveling, morons, I would appreciate it, Lord.   And if you cannot open their eyes hermetically seal their lips, please feel free to smote them when you smote The Man.   You and your followers do a great deal of good down here on Earth, yet somehow we focus on the 3.92% that’s challenging.     That’s all I got.    Thanks for a great 2010 for all of and let the smoting of The Man begin.

Oops….one more thing, Lord .  Please send me a monkey.   Haven’t you always wanted to monkey?

 

Amen,

 

Mully

 

 

Best Experienced With:       Elton John;     Tiny Dancer

 

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s celebration of our gathering for the two hundredth time up here for some quality time together.   Let’s pretend we are in the bus from “Almost Famous” and we’re all singing together.   Thanks for joining.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRK5vLUYLmg

This is #200

 

This is number two hundred in this incarnation of Mind of Mully (MoM Biz Haus Shoppe) and number four hundred three in all previous incarnations of Mind of Mully.   To generate two hundred palatable and publishable missives here, generally need to write six hundred.  The vast majority are utterly awful.   They seem good in the first five minutes and end up relegated to the hard drive folder titled “OOPS”.

The finest William Faulkner quote is “ Read, read, read.    Read everything:  trash and classics, good and bad and see how they do it.   Then write.   If it’s good, you will know it.   If it’s not, then throw it out the window.”  This Faulkner quote applies to everything in business and in life. 

Below you will find eleven beginnings of non published treatises.  The world will never see the full body of work because when finished, they sucked.  Am only sharing the beginning of each because they are eleven truly awful works of writing and sharing the entire missive would jeopardize any hope I have of ever winning a Nobel Prize for Literature or the Polk Award.   Even the cats winced as I wrote the opening paragraphs below and the cats can only read Ebonics books.   My cats are from Oakland.

Thanks for visiting and reading.   It’s always a pleasure to visit with each of you.    Here, have a sip of this an let’s have a look.

The Leo Caprio/ DD Lewis version of Gangs of New York bears little if any resemblance to the book Gangs of New York.  If you are one of the Lord’s chosen people, the book is an interesting look at conscription of The Irish as they left the whiskey drenched Emerald Isle for a larger island.  An island with more to eat than potatoes and rocks.

 __________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Zoroastrianism & Katie Bar The Door

 

 _______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Although I believe in some sort of deity, I do not believe there is a heaven or a hell.  Absolutes and black and white are as mythical of creatures as are yellow and pink striped unicorns because gray and plaid rule my universe.   There has to be some sort of deity (or deities) because how else could you explain the singularly beautiful things that pop through the haze periodically?  The moon rise this evening on a purple and pink background here in Utah, the way my niece Megan sometimes looks up at me when I’m home in The Land of Cleve, or the songs that come out of Leslie Stevens when we get to see her play with her Badgers?  None of those three can be explained by simple randomness.

 ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The Greeks perfected poetry, using it in education, art, and music.     The Greeks used poetry as a teaching tool, much as I use bunny ears as a humor tool.

He is more than a hero (Sappho)

He is more than a hero
he is a god in my eyes–
the man who is allowed
to sit beside you — he

who listens intimately
to the sweet murmur of
your voice, the enticing

laughter that makes my own
heart beat fast. If I meet
you suddenly, I can’

 ________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Time for a literal and figural memory exercise taken straight out of Highlights magazine.   Please take a close look at the picture below and memorize it.   Look good and hard because soon you will be asked to find three carefully differences in that same picture.

Do you have that photo memorized?   Good job.   Please take the Sharpie marker provided above and circle at least 3 (three) of the cleverly hidden differences in the picture below.  Circle them big and bold on your screen with the Sharpie.

 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Thesis                                               Antithesis

 

 

 __________________________________________________________________________________________________________

In life, we each choose our our own ceilings and we argue for them daily.  We also choose the start and finish lines for memories.  Most define their memory start and finish line with their children and their marital relationship.   Happily lacking both of these, I choose my start and stop points using the San Diego band, The Rugburns.  The first time I saw The Rugburns was with my friend Todd on a golf course in Pacific beach California.   As lead singer Steve Poltz sang “The thirteenth letter of the alphabet is the letter “M”….it stand for “marijuana”….the way a letter oughta….the way a letter oughta”, I was hooked for life.

Have seen The Rugburns and other incarnations of Steve Poltz at least fifty times since that initial golf course show and each concert has as enjoyable as the first.  The first song I chose to learn to play when choosing to learn guitar last year was the most perfect love song ever written, played, or listened to by lovers anywhere.  The  song is I Love Everything About You by Steve Poltz.  The most magnificent line in the song is the true definition of love.  

 

Many of you know me from work, others from play.   Most of you know that for the most part, my moral compass is unwavering and when it does waver, I do my best to pull it in tight.  I believe in black and white and I believe in shades of gray when they are needed.  I live my life through rules that are based upon what worked and what did not work in the past.  It makes it easier to make decisions rapidly.  I do not turn left across four lanes.  I choose not to put wet towels on wooden doors and I turn off lights when I leave a room.  I do not believe it is ever right to cheat on a spouse and a half truth is a lie.  I swear far too much and I’ve done some incredibly stupid and illegal things in the past.  I tell it like it is, even if it hurts because it is better to rip a scab off fast and it’s always better to know where you stand.

I choose not to cry in front of others.  I have nice orderly mental boxes into which I put things and I pull them out when I am alone.  I believe you should always be kind to animals and feed them before you eat.   Thank you letters should be sent the same day. I do not screw people over in business because it’s the man in the mirror that matters at the end of the day.  I am actually still surprised when people screw over others in business because bridges take so long to build and when you burn them, they are seldom rebuildable.  I am often a jerk and sometimes cruel, but you’ll always know what you’re getting when I walk in the door.  My compass may not point the same direction as yours and it will consistently point in the same direction.  Whether this is good or bad, right or wrong is not up for debate.   It simply is.

Johnny Lydon ( aka J. Rotten of Sex Pistols fame) and Public Image Limited finished up their reunion tour this week in New York City.  The final episode of Lost is next week.  The anarchists are still running amok in Greece and will become even more silly when Greece declares bankruptcy in the next few weeks.  Coincidence?  There is no such thing as coincidence.  Let’s pull all three of those sentences together, put them in a different context, and wrap them in a big Kafka, Gilligan’s Island and Sex Pistols ball.   Plus, let’s start and end our time together with two of my favorite calculus comics.   That’s a good Saturday evening right there.

For years I wasted thousands of dollars on business books when all I had to do was stumble like Rocky Raccoon back to my room, gut shot by a man who called himself Dan, and open the free Gideon’s Bible provided at hotels as cheap as Motel Eight and as ritzy as………wait for it…….The Ritz.    Yeppers, Tom Bodett not only leaves the light on for you, he also provides a fantastic business book in the guise of a Gideon Bible.  Just as all life lessons are business lessons, all Bible lessons are business lessons.  Take for example this one from Proverbs:  “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit”.

 

________________________________________________________________________________

 

(sung to the tune of “Hurricane” by Bob Dylan)

 ________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Interstinglyenoughmyclosestfriendsfromcollegeareallstillmarriedtotheirfirstwife.Infact,thevastmajorityofthepeopleIchoosetohangoutwithareontheirfirstmarriages.

Whileweseldomseeeachotherandtheydonotknowit,Iwatchtheirloveandlearnthroughwatchingthem.

Forthemitmovesreallyfastbecausetheyaresmackdabinthemiddleofit.Formeitmovesatregularspeed.

Becauseonthemostinterestingandchallneingofdaysloveislikethisparagraphandtheprecedingparagraph.Itrunsfastandfuriouslikearollercoatserandyouseldomhavetimetostepasideandwatchlike

Ihavebeenabletodoforalong,longtime.I adorelovestories.   Regardlessoftheirendingsandmakenomistakeaboutit.   Theyallendandwestilljumpin.

 

That was #200……and this is an Eponymousaurus.   It is a carnivore and a Fostervore.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Good night, Bethany B.   It’s nice to see you again.

 

Best Experienced With:   Dinosaur Junior;    Out There

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s poetry, comic, and musical gathering.   This is Number 197 for Mind of Mully Biz Haus Shoppe.   Number 200 will be eponymous) 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z81LcFhmqP4 

 

 

 

 

The first time I heard Dinosaur Junior, I thought of DH Lawrence’s poetry because Dinosaur Junior’s music is like placing DH Lawrence poetry against a backdrop of screaming electric guitars and then slashing the pallete with razor blades.   As Spin magazine once said on its cover:  “J Mascis is God”.

Amen

DH Lawrence (1885-1930).   Boo ya

 

Wild Things in Captivity

Wild things in captivity
while they keep their own wild purity
won't breed, they mope, they die.

All men are in captivity,
active with captive activity,
and the best won't breed, though they don't know why.

The great cage of our domesticity
kills sex in a man, the simplicity
of desire is distorted and twisted awry.

And so, with bitter perversity,
gritting against the great adversity,
they young ones copulate, hate it, and want to cry.

Sex is a state of grace.
In a cage it can't take place.
Break the cage then, start in and try.

 

I Am Like a Rose:

I am myself at last; now I achieve

My very self, I, with the wonder mellow,

Full of fine warmth, I issue forth in clear

And single me, perfected from my fellow.

Here I am all myself.  No rose-bush heaving

Its limpid sap to culmination has brought

Itself more sheer and naked out of the green

In stark-clear roses, than I to myself am brought.

The Appeal

You, Helen, who see the stars
As mistletoe berries burning in a black tree,
You surely, seeing I am a bowl of kisses
Should put your mouth to mine and drink of me.

Helen, you let my kisses steam
Wasteful into the night's black nostrils; drink
Me up, I pray; oh you, who are Night's bacchante,
How can you from my bowl of kisses shrink?

 

Gloire de Dijon

When she rises in the morning
I linger to watch her;
She spreads the bath-cloth underneath the window
And the sunbeams catch her
Glistening white on the shoulders,
While down her sides the mellow
Golden shadow glows as
She stoops to the sponge, and her swung breasts
Sway like full-blown yellow
Gloire de Dijon roses.

She drips herself with water, and her shoulders
Glisten as silver, they crumple up
Like wet and falling roses, and I listen
For the sluicing of their rain-dishevelled petals.
In the window full of sunlight
Concentrates her golden shadow
Fold on fold, until it glows as
Mellow as the glory roses.

 

Whatever’s left, just hide the rest, and bring it right in….

 

Best Experienced With:     Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds;     Into My Arms

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s Christmas night nonsense.    A beautiful little ditty by Nick Cave.   Good slow dancing music.  Crank it up, grab your partner, and slow dance.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m55-kJTjgHs

 

For some reason, I vividly remember each person I have made love with for the past three decades.  Unfortunately, I also vividly remember all those terrifying Christmas specials we were subjected to as children.    Christmas is all about love, picture cards, and those utterly terrifying Christmas TV specials. 

Take, for example, Frosty the Snowman.   All sorts of terrifying things going on in that animated Christmas special, including Jimmy Durante’s narration voice.  Sounded as if Mr. Durante was smoking a pack of Camel fliterless between each line.  As a child, I would picture Mr. Durante passing out, face purple, from either COPD of stage 4 lung cancer in between takes on set.     You have Karen leaving her parents and jumping a freight train with Frosty so that he does not die from meltation.  “Meltation” is not a real word:   do not use “meltation” in any holiday conversations.   Really, really nasty people travel this nation by jumping freight trains…these are the people who are too poor to buy Greyhound bus tickets.  You have the cop hassling Frosty and getting up Frosty’s face simply because the cop is The Man.   No wonder Karen ran away.   You have Professor Hinkle chasing Karen and Frosty around, trying to kill Frosty while cackling; “I must get that hat back! Think nasty, think nasty, think nasty!”   Think nasty?   That’s nasty.   Frosty clearly has early senile dementia because each time the hat pops back onto his head he exclaims “Happy Birthday”.  Terrifying, but not half as terrifying as The Year Without a Santa Claus.

The ideal title for a children’s Christmas special is The Christmas That You Got Everything on Your List from Santa and Thirty-Three Extra Things That You Didn’t Even Consider.  For a seven year old, the worst title for a Christmas special is The Year Without a Santa Claus.  Since his mom loved Snow Miser better than him, Heat Miser (looking like Satan) is angry at Santa and burns stuff for the entire twenty-two minutes.   You have Vixen getting tossed into the pound by The Man in Southtown and then getting sick and close to death while waiting to get put to death at the pound.   Even at that young age we knew that seventy-two hours after an animal shows up at the pound, that animal gets the gas bath.   There you are, the seven year old you, sitting on the edge of your seat watching Jingle and Jangle screw the pooch as the clock ticks down on Vixen’s seventy-two hours and Santa remains in bed with a “cold”…really just angry that no one really believes in him.    This fits, because he doesn’t exist.   Terrifying, but not as terrifying as The Grinch Who Stole Christmas.

The Grinch Who Stole Christmas is narrated by Boris Karloff, the man who played Frankenstein and the villains in Isle of the Dead and The Body Snatchers.  Apparently Lon Chaney and Bela Lugosi had other commitments when the producers were looking for the ideal narrator for a children’s Christmas special.    The Grinch treats his doggy, Max,  in a Michael Vick like fashion and then heads down into Whoville from Mount Crumpit and steals everything in town.   There you are, the seven year old you, watching this green guy who just beat his dog senseless stealing every single present in Whoville.  That’s uplifting.   Each and every year I watched that flick as a child I would hope and pray that the Whos down in Whoville would converge on the Grinch when he roared back into town like a pack of rabid dogs, ripping him to pieces and then discarding all their wrapping paper on his still warm body.   Cindy Lou Who standing on the Grinch’s chest with a miniature Lousiville Slugger screaming: “There’s a bulb out, eh?     A bulb?   Lie to me now about my tree, pal!   Oh…you can’t, can you?   Because you’re dead now, you damn thief!”    

None of those have as much angst and terror as Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer.    First thing we see if Rudolf’s dad rejecting him six minutes after he is born and the rejection goes on and on.    I always wanted to be able to levitate as a child, but lived in fear that if I ever realized my dream of levitation, my father would pack a bunch of mud onto my nose and tie lead to my feet so that no one else would see the “real” me.   Donner was a jerk and perpetuated the myth that if you are different, you will be ostracized.  Then, Clarice’s father forbids Clarice from hanging with Rudolf because he was different, further propagating the ostracization.      That’s a fake word.   Ostracization is not a real word so do not use it.   People will laugh at you if you work “ostracization” into a holiday conversation. 

What happens after Clarice’s father tells his daughter to only date the “normal” reindeer boys?   Yep.  Rudolf and the dentist elf guy and Yukon Cornelius go to the concentration camp that is the Island of Misfit Toys where we find a ton of toys that any of us as a seven year old could have fixed.    We could have emptied the jelly out of the squirt gun and filled it with water.   We could have taken the square wheels that some moron put on the train and replaced them with round wheels.   How tough would it have been to change Charlie’s name to Jack and, all these years later, none of us can figure out what the hell was wrong with the “dolly for Sue”.    That was a perfectly good doll.   Go watch Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer again.   Watch it over and over and over and over and over again.   I defy you to find anything wrong with that doll.

Fast forward to the end and you have an abominable snowman who had all of his teeth pulled out, a flying lion who is still flying around and stealing perfectly good toys to populate his island of “misfits”, and Mrs. Claus finally got Santa fat.   Do you remember the swing in Santa’s weight in forty-seven minutes?   Terrifying example of bulimia.   That entire Christmas special is terrifying.

Onto the holiday cards, the photo ones in particular.   Rest assured that your annual photo cards are not wasted when you send them to The LJ each year.  I watch your children grow up on the inside of the cabinet doors here in the office.   Each time I grab a book to read or lend out, I get to look at your children and that’s quite cool.    Thanks for sharing.    All twelve cabinet doors are now almost filled and if you continue to procreate, will have to get a bigger house down the road.    Here’s a sample of your cute kids and your holiday cards:

 

 

Had a brief flirtation with being a husband and for the entire period of the engagement through the end of the marriage, those vivid images disappeared.   It was Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, it was effortless, and it was quite wonderful.  With no thought or intention, those vivid, nekked memories packed themselves into a box and self sealed the lid.    That was pretty damn cool.

I guess that would be a damn fine definition of true love.  It’s a great deal of fun to watch you people in love during the holidays, walking around holding hands and giggling.   It is still utterly terrifying to watch those evil Christmas specials.

Merry Christmas, Happy Festival of Lights, & joyous whatever else you may be celebrating this week.

 

Best Experienced With:      Delta Spirit;         Bushwick Blues (acoustic version)

 

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music to this evening’s poetry gathering and art showing in a new browser window)

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtPjg0Jfpqc

 

 Amedeo Clemente Modigliani (July 12, 1884 – January 24, 1920)

I felt a Funeral, in my Brain,

And Mourners to and fro

Kept treading, treading — till it seemed

That Sense was breaking through

 

 

And when they all were seated,

A Service, like a Drum

Kept beating, beating — till I thought

My Mind was going numb

 

 

And then I heard them lift a Box

And creak across my Soul

With those same Boots of Lead, again,

Then Space — began to toll,

 

 

 

As all the Heavens were a Bell,

And Being, but an Ear,

And I, and Silence, some strange Race

Wrecked, solitary, here

 

And then a Plank in Reason, broke,

And I dropped down, and down —

And hit a World, at every plunge,

And Finished knowing — then —

 

Emily Elizabeth Dickinson (December 10, 1830 – May 15, 1886)

 

 

 

 

 

Best Experienced With:          Pearl Jam;           Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town

(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music for this evening’s treatise.    The perfect last minute Christmas gift idea from Mind of Mully Biz Haus Shoppe.   You are welcome)

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YF-5vW4GbsQ

 

Three shopping days remaining until the holiest of all gift giving days.  Here is $100.00.   Quick, name six holiday presents you can buy for $100.00.

What did you name?   Those are some solid answers.  Me?    Thanks for asking.   I named the following:

1.  One hundred rolls of pennies
2. Forty-eight Foster’s oil cans
3. One fifth of a share of Google on the NASDAQ
4. Twenty-three Slinkies
5. Eight hundred green army men toys
6. A year of elementary education in Primary School for a child in Haiti

 

The Ideal Gift

As you may have surmised, the ideal  last minute gift to purchase a friend or loved one is #6 above:   a year of Primary School for a child in Haiti.   Have mentioned here in the past that Haiti is a Horatio Alger story that ends on page six.   One of the levers that can change the poverty cycle over a long event horizon is educating children.  Poor children are more likely to suffer a higher rate of cognitive delays and developmental disorders and, absent intervention, are likely to perpetuate a cycle of poverty.   A single $100 sponsorship can help change someone’s fortunes and is a far better gift than twenty-three slinkies.  

Unlike in the United States, education in Haiti is for a fee and there are a bunch of good kids who need sponsors.  Promise for Haiti has done a wonderful job over the years administering a program whereby they match up sponsors with good kids who want to learn.  I vouch for Promise for Haiti and guarantee that your $100 will put a child through Primary School…they are good peeps.  In fact, here is a link to the scholarship page on their web site.  Have a look for yourself:

http://promiseforhaiti.org/Eductaion.aspx

Perhaps you are pressed for time and cannot get to the mall.   It’s well past the safe period to get a gift shipped from an online mall.    How can you get $100 to Promise for Haiti and make a gift of an education?  You can call the H.E.L.P desk at 641-628-9353 and speak with a live human being.  Or, you can send $100 to:

          Haitian Education and Literacy Program

          Joanne Schaefer, Education Coordinator

          Box 275

          Pella, Iowa  50219

The MAFF

 

Average number of visitors to Mind of Mully Biz Haus Shoppe over the past thirty days has been two hundred thirty-two per day.    If you have checked all the boxes on your 2010 gift list, perhaps you would be so kind as to pass this on to two friends and perhaps they could pass it on to two more friends?  

232 x 2 = 464

464 x 2 = 928

928 x2 = 1,856

And on it goes.    Maybe we can get 1,000 or so last minute shoppers to sponsor a wonderful child for a year of elementary education.  What’s in it for you?   Aside from helping to shape the future of a child, what tangible thing will your gift recipient have from you?  

First, twice a year your gift recipient will receive a color report card from Promise for Haiti with a photo, grades, and an update on how your sponsored child is doing.   The report card will look like this:

Second, and for a limited time only, Mind of Mully is offering the following to the first five folks who choose to give the gift of education through the Promise for Haiti scholarship project.  Send an email to danmulligan4@yahoo.com stating that you have given this as a gift and we will send you one of the sets of bunny ears shown below.   Each is autographed and has been worn in a Mind of Mully Indefinite Time Period episode.  Please email your address and the following single line:  “I promoted education”.   We work under the honor system here and that’s all you need to say.  “I promoted education”.

More?   Sure, why not.   Also for a limited time, the first five people who send a link to this page to ten friends and ask them to send it one to at least five friends will receive a set of bunny ears signed by either my cat Ceeeeeeeeeatie, or one of the kittens from the last foster group.    These are limited edition bunny ears because cats have no opposable thumbs and odds are that no one else in the galaxy can train cats to sign bunny ears.    Same instructions as above, please.    Simply send an email to danmulligan4@yahoo.com saying “I forwarded a link to promote education” and your cat autographed bunny ears will arrive within two weeks.

Thanks for reading and, in advance, thanks for passing this on to more folks.   Go ahead and cut and paste the link up there into an email and send it to a few friends.   Cut and paste it into your Facebook page and let’s promote education for some good kids in the central plateau of Haiti.

The Alternate Gift Idea

Should “giving” not be up your alley, may we suggest a Slinky?    Slinkies are a great deal of fun.