Best Experienced With: Rage Against The Machine; Sleep Now in the Fire
(Please right click on the link below to open the suggested background music in a new browser window.)
Learned about the Circle Jerks, the Dead Kennedys, and Black Flag through Rolling Stone magazine because The Land of Cleve has never been fashion forward in the punk rock department unless you count the evening Joan Jett spent at the downtown Holiday Inn after smashing her guitar and amplifier to bits at the Akron Agora in 1979. Rolling Stone introduced native Clevelanditians to punk rock and mosh pits. I fell in love with mosh pits eighteen years before the Lord gave me the opportunity to dive into one. And out of one. And back into one. From Rolling Stone, I developed a deep and abiding love of punk rock and mosh pits. Much like Adderall to an eleven year old, punk rock and mosh pits soothe my soul.
Rolling Stone gave us ridiculously unique and special writers such as Hunter S. Thompson, God rest his brilliant, drug addled soul. Aside from Saint Thompson, Rolling Stone introduced me to five of my favorite authors: Joe Klein, Owen Fegan, Evan Wright, and P.J. O’Rourke. Mr. O’Rourke visited my alma mater back in “the day” and read some excerpts from what would become his finest work, Holidays in Hell. From Rolling Stone and P.J. O’Rourke, and Holidays in Hell, I developed a deep and abiding love of travel to third world countries, especially when they are ablaze. Both figuratively and literally.
The world’s finest and largest mosh pit is happening in the streets of Cairo as you read this. As I watch the Cairoidianites having their nightly celebrations in Tahrir Square, I picture them dancing around to Rage Against the Machine’s Sleep Now in the Fire and Offspring’s Bad Habit. That’s one heck of sweet mosh pit you have going on there, Egypt. Well done and “mabruck”, Cairo moshers!
Would appreciate it tremendously if you kids can please get Hosni to end his role as non-benevolent despot by Tuesday at midnight. You see, when Hosni changed the curfew from 8:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. on Sunday, he salted my mosh pit game a bit. That four hour change in curfew made Delta Flight 84 switch from a blinking green “on time” to a steady yellow “may be delayed or diverted due to civil unrest.” While that is most certainly the coolest flight update ever issued by Delta Airlines, it is going to keep some of us away from the world’s finest and largest mosh pit.
Your Receipt and Itinerary (Scan this barcode at a Delta Self-Service Kiosk to access your reservation.)
DANIEL MULLIGAN 5580 LA JOLLA BLVD LA JOLLA CA 92037-7651
DELTA CONFIRMATION #: HJRA6C TICKET #: 00623421149890 Bkng Meals/ Seat/ Day Date Flight Status Class City Time Other Cabin --- ----- --------------- ------ ----- ---------------- ------ ------ ------- Thu 03FEB DELTA 2892 OK R LV SAN DIEGO 740A B 7C AR ATLANTA 240P FIRST Thu 03FEB DELTA 84* OK O LV ATLANTA 525P D *S$ AR CAIRO 425P# BUSINESS *Change of equipment required Wed 09FEB DELTA 85 OK O LV CAIRO 1125P D 2C AR NYC-KENNEDY 515A# BUSINESS Thu 10FEB DELTA 2657 OK O LV NYC-KENNEDY 910A B 2C AR SAN DIEGO 1231P BUSINESS
As you can see in the photo above, last Saturday and Sunday I did my trip preparation. Did a good shoulder and chest work out, got my hair buzzed into my CIA ‘do, and stocked up on Kodiak. It is exceptionally challenging to find Kodiak in the Middle East. Made reservations at the Ramses Hilton with a corner room overlooking both the Nile and Tahrir Square. Am very much looking forward to sipping mimosas this coming Saturday morning with Christiane Amanpour and Mallory Simon at the Windows on the World restaurant atop the Ramses Hilton. Ms. Amanpour will flirt shamelessly with the wait staff while Mallory and I arm wrestle for the check. The three of us will count helicopters and F-14’s while discussing how Jann Wenner has finally turned around the magazine we have all adored since childhood
Because when Ms. Simon and Ms. Amanpour ask what I am doing in Cairo, I’m going to say I am a freelance journalist writing for Rolling Stone magazine. If you want to stay utterly safe and sound in any revolution in any universe, you need only two things. You need a CIA looking hairdo and you need press credentials.
As of this evening (thanks to Stevie JC and a Pacific beach barber shop), I have both. See you soon, Cairo.
“So raise your fist and march around, just don’t take what you need.
I’ll jail and bury those committed and smother the rest in greed.”